When I run, I feel that it is my time to escape from the world. Let’s face it… we all need a little escape every now and again. During my warm up I take that time to breathe in the fresh air, spread my arms wide and thank GOD for my health! I tuned into a wonderful and inspirational pod cast (as I often do) and set out for my 3 mile run.
Most of the first mile was uphill on a sidewalk. My heart was racing and a few times I had to walk to pace myself but I finally made it to the top! The rest was downhill. This is the BEST part as I love to sprint down! I was flying, feeling like a gazelle, happy as can be, endorphins running high, heart pounding, lungs filled with air and a smile in my heart until suddenly…. my foot hit a large rock and I went pummeling to the ground.
I laid there in a cloud of dust, dirt, sweat and (almost) tears. I have run close to 1,000 times and have never had this type of fall. I gathered myself together and walked to a nearby shady tree to access the damage. Nothing too serious except for hamburger hands and knee. My shoulder had tons of skin missing and my right hand started to swell. My head hurt too so I just laid down in the shade, took a few deep breaths and told myself, “Natalie, you are going to be ok!”
Once I pulled myself together, I called my husband (thank God for cell phones) then walked over a mile back to my car. It has been almost 4 weeks since the fall and I am almost 100% back to normal. Nothing broken and no permanent damage. It could have been so much worse!!
BUT WHY DID THIS HAPPEN???
Then my dear friend and mentor Amy Thedinga said, “Natalie, maybe you are supposed to STOP and just…….. feel.” I wasn’t sure what she meant about that until I did some soul searching. I asked myself some deep questions.
Why am I keeping myself so busy?
What am I trying to prove?
Why do I sometimes put others in front of myself?
Am I running from something?
Am I numbing feelings that I need to “feel”?
What do I truly want to do with my life?
Am I good enough?
What am I waiting for?
This fall actually lead me down a path that is crucial for me to take. There are so many things that I need to work on with my past if I want to get clear with my future! I can’t grow at all in life if I don’t accept who I am, work on my personal development daily, realize that I AM enough and truly believe in all my heart that I can do anything with my life! However I have to BELIEVE 100% in myself first. I have to work on ME and that takes a lot of time. No one is perfect. Everyone on this earth wants to be loved, understood, cared for and valued!
I have to nourish my body daily with nutritious foods and clean water and I also have to nourish my mind with books, videos and clues that many successful people have left behind. Here is a favorite nugget.....
This book has made me embrace who I am:
I am vulnerable
I make mistakes
I have had to deal with extreme sadness, grief, stress and depression in my life and its OK!
I’m not perfect… no one is
I love myself enough to work on ME daily
Courage is contagious
I have to learn to be more patient with myself
One of Brené’s friends Katherine Center says,
“You have to be brave with your life so that others can be brave with theirs.”
What did I learn through this fall? That sometimes it's ok to just STOP and BE. Be who I truly am instead of how I think others want me to be.
Because of Brené Brown's book and encouragement, I am working on letting go of what others think, of perfectionism, of numbing and powerlessness, of scarcity and fear of the dark. I am working on letting go of comparison, anxiety, self-doubt and the thought of always having to be in control. I am letting go of who I think I am supposed to be and embracing who I already am. It is HARD but is uncovering things I never knew existed within myself.
I will keep learning daily and I will also make mistakes. I will continue growing into the strong and independent woman I am supposed to be so that I can encourage others to do the same.
I AM ENOUGH! You know what? YOU ARE TOO!
HERE are some natural solutions that I used to heal faster :) I don't know what I would have done without the "Owie Spray."